Some Jokes For Fun guys ^^

There’s a man who has such big feet that when it rains,
he lies down and uses them as umbrellas.

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“ I snored so much and so loud that I used to wake myself up” a man told his friend.
“ What did you do about it?” his friend asked.
“ Oh,” the man said, “ now I sleep in the next room and I don’t hear a thing.”

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last winter, the cow caught such a bad cold that she gave ice cream instead of milk.

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On day, a man was riding a horse when he passed a dog on the road.
“Good morning,” the dog said.
“I didn’t know dogs could talk,” the man said.
“Neither did I,” the horse said.

1-

Two cows are standing in a field.
One says to the other "Are you worried about Mad Cow Disease?"
The other one says "No, It doesn't worry me, I'm a horse!"

-2-

Teacher: Tell me a sentence that starts with an "I".
Student: I is the....
Teacher: Stop! Never put 'is' after an "I". Always put 'am' after an "I".
Student: OK. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.

-3-

A man receives a phone call from his doctor.
The doctor says, "I have some good news and some bad news."
The man says, "OK, give me the good news first."
The doctor says, "The good news is, you have 24 hours to live."
The man replies, "Oh no! If that's the good news, then what's the bad news?"
The doctor says, "The bad news is, I forgot to call you yesterday."

-4-

Teacher: What are some products of the West Indies?
Student: I don't know.
Teacher: Of course, you do. Where do you get sugar from?
Student: We borrow it from our neighbor.

-5-

Son: Dad, what is an idiot?
Dad: An idiot is a person who tries to explain his ideas in such a strange and long way that another person who is listening to him can't understand him. Do you understand me?
Son: No.




A:Hey,man! please call me a taxi
........B:yes,sir.You are a taxi



.." The doctor to the patient:"Your are very sick
?"The patient to the doctor:"Can I get a second opinion
."The doctor again:"Yes, you are very ugly too



A:I have the perfect son
?B: does he smoke
A:No, hedoesn't
?B: does he drink whiskey
A:No,he doesn't
?B:does he ever come home late
A:No,he doesn't
??B:I guess you really do have the perfect son .How ld is he
A:He will be six months old next wednesday



One a crowded bus,one man noticed that another man had his eyes closed..."What's the matter? Are you sick..? the man :No ,I'm okay. It's just that I hate to see an old lady standing



Fred is 32 years old and he is still single
one day a friend asked,"Why aren't you married? Can't you find a woman who will be a good wife..? fred eplied, "Actually, I've found many women that I have wanted to marry,but when Ibring them home to meet my parent's my mother doesn't like them
His friend thinks for a moment and says."I've go the perfect solution,just find a girl who's just like ypur mother
A few months later they meet again and his friend says"Did you find the perfect girl??..Did your mother like her
With a frown on his face, Fred answer:Yes , I found the perfect girl.She was just like my mother you were right .my mother liked her very much
The friend said:Then what's the problem?? fred replied:My father doesn't like her


TEACHER : "George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn't punish him?"
JOHNNY : "Because George still had the ax in his hand."
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TEACHER : Now, ! Sam, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating? SAM : No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
TEACHER: Willie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
WILLIE : Me!
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TEACHER : Tommy, why do you always get so dirty?
TOMMY : Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
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TEACHER : Ellen, give me a sentence starting with "I."
ELLEN : I is...
TEACHER : No, Ellen..... Always say, "I am."
ELLEN : All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
_____________
TEACHER : "Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"
JOHNNY : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time."
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TEACHER : Desmond, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as brother's. Did you copy his?
DESMOND : No, teacher, it's the same dog!
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TEACHER : What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
PUPIL : A teacher.

WITH MY BEST REGARDS


i think thats enough ^^[/center]

lol i like the first one